A reasonable Question about Adopting Special Needs.

KAZ asks the obvious:


While it's very kind to accept special needs kids, why would one specifically seek them?

There are a fair number of reasons to adopt special needs - here are a few:

Much shorter waiting period.

More options for grant money (of course this is offset by potential medical costs, but still).

The chance to get a child under a year old (the ONLY chance now for Korea - they now have a mandatory waiting period for traditional adoption). This one is important to us specifically because bonding issues with the child are greatly reduced if you are able to start earlier.

That good feeling you get helping someone who really needs it.

Not necessarily in that order.

That 2-3 year waiting period for non special needs children is a guesstimate - it could be longer. Many countries - Korea included - recently decided that they were going to change all the rules regarding adoptions. The Hague convention, while not in effect in a lot of countries, has thrown Europe completely off kilter for international adoption and Asia has gotten on this kick about trying to keep their children local. Korea, for instance, has decided to limit the number of children that are adopted internationally by using the following measures:

Mandating that children be given at least a year where in-country adoption is the only option.

offering financial incentives to natives for adopting - I think it's both an initial cash payment and a monthly stipend.

launching an advertising campaign touting the benefits of adoption.

(They are fighting an uphill battle on this one because Koreans are STRONGLY patriarchal. Culturally, paternity is of HUGE importance there - and not just to the parents. In many areas an adopted child will be a social outcast simply because he's not really related. In fact, if a couple does decide to adopt in Korea, a common means of doing so is to go on an extended "trip" and come back saying "I was pregnant when I left - look at our new child" - in direct contrast to U.S. history, where girls were sent away so they could come back and say they were NOT pregnant. Of course, if the child has an American component to his parentage, this tendency is greatly magnified as well. But all of this is just an aside - the point is that they are attempting to restrict international adoption by roughly an order of magnitude, so if you attempt to adopt traditionally, you have slim pickings).

All of the above is irrelevant if you are willing to accept special needs, however. In addition to being strongly patriarchal, Koreans have a HUGE aversion to physical or mental abnormalities. Basically, even the Korean Government knows better than to try to get special needs children adopted locally - they are, for all intents and purposes, unadoptable by Korean standards. So, all those new restrictions and impediments to adoption don't apply to children with special needs.

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