Differences of Love with Adopted or Biological Children - Could it be?

Differences of Love with Adopted or Biological Children

I have four children (1 biological and 3 adopted) which I love them all but I do have completely different relationships with them. I have stronger relationships with two of my daughters. This is not something I choose or planned, it just is. Surprise, surprise it is not the baby of the family she is all daddy’s girl along with my son, I am just the filler while daddy is not around. While I know that she loves me I realize that she has a strong bond with her daddy which I am fine with.

I guess I am closer with two of my daughters because we spend more time together and share the same interest. These are the two that will appear the moment I get into the bathtub sitting on the floor wanting to talk, if I lay down in the bed they are crawling right in with me, they know when I do not feel good or am having a bad day, and these two can read me quite well. This I believe makes our relationship different and deeper than with my other two children.

I am closer to my dad, but that does not mean I do not love my mom very much. This is true and accepted when it is about parents or other people in own lives but viewed differently about our children. The relationship is different with my mom (adoptive) I believe because we are different people with different interest, needs, and that we do not share that deep bond. My world revolves around my children, and she is not the involved grandmother type. While my dad and I share a lot of the same interest and he is very involved with my children. Maybe it does not have a thing to do with being adopted.

I have always wondered why people feel the need to make everything appear the same or be equal with each child. We have some family members that would buy the same thing for each of my children which is kind of crazy when the ages range from 13 to 1. I have one daughter that loves cars and the other two like dolls, so I do not force one to get something she does not want just to keep things the same. Having different feelings, relationships and bonds doesn’t mean you do not love your children, parents or anyone else.

Could it be more about our personalities? Why do things have to be different for our children or is it just taboo to talk about?